Common thought is that women have a low libido while a man’s sex drive is as aware and ready to go as a marine waiting to deploy for war.
Complaints for the desire for more and frequent sex are beginning to change gender.
Low libido in men is a much more of a common complaint than previously thought.
In couples seeking counseling, as much as 40% of men complained about their significant others desire for sex being too much for them.
Now, we can either go back in time to Paleolithic man and look at his role to procreate and take sex when and how he desired. He didn’t care about what his girl wanted or when because she was not going anywhere and her feelings didn’t mater.
Or we can look at modern man in modern day. We, the men, thought we had it figured out. Get in touch with our feminine side and talk more and listen better. Right? Wrong. We begrudgingly talked and listened more only to learn that isn’t enough to keep her satisfied. SHE WANTS MORE SEX DAMN IT! Who’d a thought?
While some of us may be excited about this information, remember there is always a catch. Oh she wants more sex alright, but she wants it her way. We have to kiss her neck, massage her and do everything else you were suppose to remember t do while you were “listening better.”
Want to keep your relationship strong? Hell for some how about just keeping your relationship these days.
Now I am not saying sex is the most important role in keeping a relationship together and happy. I am, however, saying it is a form of bonding that has a give and take mentality and application to keep it relationship healthy. Just as “listening” “talking” and getting in touch with your feminine side will keep you out of hot water and keep her desire to want you.
For the ladies here is a little insight about men.
We will romance you to get you. If and when we fall in love with you we will still desire you but we will fall prey to the comfort zone and begin to change priorities for our work in many cases. If we didn’t we would all be poor. Because sex would rule out lives and we would get nothing done. It’s not that you are not important, you are, but we tend to need a nudge at times with your, oh so perfect communication skills. We do not need nagging! Why do we need this nudge? I can blame it on self-deprecation and say I/we are too stupid to recognize what you want until we are in the dog-house. Or that we do NOT play guessing games so communicate to us want you want.
Going back thousands of years again to Paleolithic modern man’s function and role was to provide and procreate. Can we apply ourselves and be more caring today than we use to 5000 years ago? Of course but primordially we are not always going to take the initiative in the way you want at the times you want so stop beating us up for it.
In addition, since this is about a man’s decline for sex, there a few things you need to know about a man’s hormones and how lifestyle affects them and his sex drive. Keep in mind some of the lifestyles I will address affect females as well in an adverse way toward sex.
Modern day man-for the most part- is not fit, eats horribly, is stressed and takes some form of over the counter medication or prescription that influences his or her desires for sex.
In the beginning of a monogamous relationship it is common, as it should be to be to hanging from the chandelier and have twice per day sex. Especially if the man is in his 20’s or 30’s and fit. Roughly from puberty to 40 a fit man will happily oblige when and how often you want it. Interestingly we all have the ability to have sex until we are old and die, keep in mind as hormones decline so does the sex life. So if you are 45 year old man with a new bride of 25 you may need assistance keeping up. I am not referring to the first six months, but everything after that, well have fun keeping up
Here are some of the top reasons men complain about their lack of desire for sex.
Here's a list of ten common reasons why men may not want sex:
1. Medications. Antidepressants (SSRI-type) and antihypertensives (blood pressure medication) are often the culprit when a man has a lowered interest in sexual activity. These can also cause sexual dysfunction.
2. Lack of sleep. When a man is in his teens or twenties, the opportunity to have sex will often overwhelm the desire to sleep. This is often true also when a relationship is brand new. But, as people and relationships age, sex can lose its compelling nature and a good night's rest can be quite can take over.
3. Hormonal levels. The most important physiological stimulant of sexual desire is testosterone. Low testosterone will suppress sexual desire. When man is in his later 30’s and 40’s he will often have less desire for sex. Some choose to look into hormone replacement therapy others can do it the natural way. Exercise and eat well. Proper exercise will raise hormone levels and change his desire within a week or so.
p.s the same exercise and eating changes can be said for a women who is not healthy
4. Identity issues. Identity Issues at work or is out of work, faces the death of an important family member, becomes disheartened about a formerly held strong belief, and questions his understanding of his own sexual orientation
5. Turn-off to aspects of the sex. Some men will turn away from sex rather than have sex that is not fulfilling to them. Lack of fulfillment can be related to specific things the female does during sex. It may just seem like too much "work." He may have sexual interests that he knows or fears his partner may not like. Yes we know ladies you have similar issues when the man does not turn you on, but this is about why a man’s libido is low
6. Arguments or Disagreements. Yes men, like women shy away from sex when there is constant arguing. Men may just plain refuse their partner's advances.
7. Financial and family related Stress. Loss of a job, trouble paying bills, challenges at work, and parenting can all have huge impact on sexual desire.
8. Thinking of another. Masturbation while thinking of another or thinking of you in different roles, clothes and/or positions that you will not do. Or men are afraid to ask. This comes back to effective communication.
9. Prolonged time between sex, fear of initiation. It can be awkward, almost like being with someone for the first time even though you have been together for months or years. It is strongly suggested you seek couples therapy
This is a common cause of declining sexual frequency in couples.
10. Difficulties functioning sexually. Many men who have an erection dysfunction (ED), or believe that they ejaculate too soon -- or too late (if at all), may avoid have sex.
When a women’s desire for sex is not met; criticism, arguing or comments on his manhood exacerbate the situation. Time, patients and learning how to address the problems will be your best bet. Together!
